Home » Writing » Fiction » Detective John Dorm Pt.2

Detective John Dorm Pt.2

FX: Jazzy Sax music to denote a detective story.

John (voiceover): Wednesday night. I had returned home in my car which I had used to drive from the events of the previous episode. As I was developing the pictures of Mr. Lotsacats and the saucy broad he was balls-deep inside of, the red and black light of the dark room made everything seem mysterious and red and black.

Wilson: Hello John, I’ve been here the whole time.

John: Yes, I remember.

Wilson: Any leads on the case?

John: As a matter of fact, the case is solved. Mr. Lotsacats made it only too easy for me to take these filthy photos of his foul frisky fornication.

Wilson: Isn’t that Mrs. Lotsacats? I recognise her from the last episode.

John: I thought she looked familiar.

Wilson: (resignedly) Right. And what’s the dead body for?

John: What body? What are you talking about? You’re not making any sense!

Wilson: That body in the doorway. You walked right over it to get in here.

John: I have no recollection of that.

Wilson: I saw you pushing it out of the way.

John: Oh that! I thought that was just a pile of garbage.

Wilson: Right.

(long pause)

Wilson: Maybe we should take a look…?

John: Okay, he’s medium build, blue eyes, brown hair, 6’1”, 43 years old, an organ donor…

Wilson: You’re just reading his drivers license.

John: …licensed to drive C class vehicles, “please carry license when driving” Then there’s just a bunch of scribbles.

Wilson: That’s his signature.

John: This man appears to have drowned.

Wilson: What makes you think that?

John: Because there’s some kind of red water coming out of that bullet hole in his head.


That’s a joke. This man was murdered.

FX: Jazzy sax.


John (voiceover): After a good night’s sleep, I called the police. A short while later my office was a crime scene. And not the kind with good coffee.

Officer: Mr. Dorm, you should have called us immediately.

John: I know. He’s starting to get a bit whiffy. (sips) This coffee is terrible.

Officer: This is a very serious situation you’ve gotten yourself into, I have to consider the reasons you didn’t call us earlier.

Wilson (arriving): I got here as early as I could. Have the police been here long?

John: Yeah. About an hour.

Wilson: An hour!? When did you call them?

John: About an hour ago.

Wilson: I thought you called them when I left! What where you doing all night!?

John: Sleeping.

Officer: Mr Dorm?

John: Do you know, I haven’t known you for very long officer whatever-your-name-is, but in that brief window of time, I like to think we’ve become good friends.

Officer: I am arresting you on suspicion of Murder. I am going to have to ask you to accompany me to the station.

John: The radio station?

Officer: No. (Pause) The Police station.

FX: (Jazzy sax to denote a cliffhanger)


End of Part Two.


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